I step off the plane, and start to look around – preparing myself for the reverse culture shock that I know is waiting just around the corner. It always happens, even to the most seasoned of travelers, no matter how much we prepare ourselves for it. With our heads and our hearts full of the noisy, dirty bustle of some exotic “third-world” country; our thoughts lingering over the smiles of the people whose lives are so much poorer and yet, curiously, so much richer than ours; our conscious troubled by the sad reality of the world which is divided between those who have too much and those who have too little, we prepare to re-enter society. But no matter how prepared we are in those first few days of “re-entry”, it always happens. We see something, hear something, read something and suddenly we find ourselves stopping, drawn up short with this “what the?!” look on our faces, and thinking ‘what on earth am I doing here?’ We struggle, trying to make sense of it all: our brains working overtime to get us back to a position of acceptance so we can feel once again like this life is normal and return to our daily routines. It’s the phenomenon that has become known as “reverse culture shock”. It may take a few hours, a few days, a few weeks but most people eventually pass this point, and life goes back to normal. For a handful of people (dare I say the lucky ones?), it just doesn’t click – as happened to me the first time I returned from Guatemala. I gave it time, as per the helpful advice from friends and family. That time went from days to weeks and eventually to months, but I just couldn’t get it. The contrasts were too stark, my conscious too troubled and the rage against the machine too strong. Within 3 months I had bought a one-way ticket back.
Proposed site for Seres and Somos
But this time is different. This time I clutch a return ticket to Guatemala firmly in my hand, and I go with vision and purpose – in the name of Project Seres and my work in Central America. I have landed in Vancouver, where I will meet with my close friends Greg and Heather from Project Somos and for the first time meet with the Board of Directors for Compassion Fruit Society to sign the Memorandum of Understanding that will propel Project Seres forward to a whole new level. It is an exciting moment.
I step off the plane, and the first thing that I notice is an advertisement for a new housing development. “Urban synchronisity, vegetated architecture, sustainable living”. I stop in my tracks and stare at the billboard, perplexed. Troubled. Urban Synchronisity…Vegetated Architecture – in the name of sustainability? I don’t even know what that means. I am also pretty sure that the people thinking of buying into this paradise don’t either – but that’s what the marketing world has done to climate change. We soothe our troubled minds by buying into things that we don’t really understand, trusting blindly that the people who are supposed to understand are guiding us in the right direction. Yeah right. One-nil to the marketing gurus.
Proposed site for Seres and Somos
I haven’t even made it through the airport gates before I find myself in possession of some new hand cream and a bottle of perfume – absolute necessities that I have no idea how I lived without in Guatemala (please note the sarcastic tone of that last sentence). It is a phenomenon which I can’t explain, and that I struggle with each time I return. It is as though the plane that has carried me from Guatemala to Canada has taken me through some magical portal, that makes me add 10 pounds, age 5 years and make all my clothes look like they belong in the rag pile. Within a few hours of being here I find myself glancing in the mirror, worried about new wrinkles that I didn’t have last time I left and which a few days ago I would have proudly proclaimed were places where smiles had been. I am suddenly hyper-aware of what I eat, wondering if I should try and fit a run in before the day is over. I am self-conscious about walking around with all the shiny, pretty people and I wonder whether I have enough time and money to get a pedicure before I fly to Australia to see my Mum. I honestly do wonder what has happened to my sanity, when I catch myself looking down at my toes and wondering in all seriousness whether I can get fake acrylic toenails stuck on to replace the two that I lost working on the project in Guatemala. To be quite honest, I am scared to stay in this place too long, lest I get over my culture-shock and accept that all this is normal once again.
Proposed site for Somos and Seres
But right now, there is no fear of that. I have only ten short days here in Canada, and I am half-way through. The first five days have been incredible, as Heather and I have launched full-swing into planning and strategizing for Somos and Seres. The energy that we give each other from working together – that we discovered in Guatemala over 5 months ago – is with us again, and we work in a fury of productivity that I am sure would amaze most people. We are two women with vision and purpose, determined to make a difference in this world and I feel so alive to be back again in this environment with kindred spirits. From office to lounge room to coffee shop we plan fundraisers, prepare for board meetings, and work out how we are going to raise the USD550K that we need to purchase the land in Guatemala where we will build the two projects. For the first time in over four months, I have started dreaming again and I fall asleep with Project Seres on my mind, to wake refreshed with new ideas and plans to work on during the day.
Our current challenge – for both Somos and Seres – is the capital campaign. It is not an easy task to raise 550K, but I know that we will do it. Yesterday, I decided to take a break from the 3-hour fundraising session with Greg, Heather and one of the Board members (Dennis) and went for a jog. My mind was full of concerns and doubts about how we would raise enough money for a deposit that would secure the land we had located in Guatemala – the perfect site for both projects. As I ran, letting my mind clear, I started to take in my surroundings. I ran along streets with large houses, peacefully set back at a respectful distance from the footpath – a big change from the high walls, bars and broken bottles that cramp in on you along the sidewalks of Antigua. I looked at the new “green” 4WDs and SUVs, a house the size of a quarter of a block, with each one of its energy-efficient lights blazing in the evening and I wondered: is this Urban Synchronicity and Sustainable Living? As I took it all in, I couldn’t help but begin to feel slightly jaded. Here we were sitting, racking our brains for ways to come up with the money to make Seres and Somos tangible realities, surrounded by houses in which any one of them could easily fit all of the children and foster mums that will make up the Somos Children’s Village. Or for which the price tag would be more than sufficient to allow me to build the Seres College and begin providing climate change education to a people that are already beginning to feel the effects of this threat. But it also gives me hope. Because what seems like such a hugh amount in Guatemala is really not that much in the west, and I know that we will find what we need to make these projects happen.
Proposed site for Seres and Somos
As the next five days pass, and my time to leave rushes up, I am faced with a difficult decision: whether or not to return to Guatemala. At the start of a capital campaign, there is discussion as to whether or not my time is better spent either here in Canada or in Australia, fundraising and looking for donors to support the project. Although my heart (and my dog) is in Guatemala, and I feel every day the urgent need of the people living there, struggling to deal with the effects of climate change that are now impacting their daily lives, I know that I must place myself where I will be most effective. And that may mean leaving Guatemala for a few months….but as I promised to Jango and my friends when I left: I will be back!
Peace,
Corrina
